Tuesday, February 7, 2012
      Tweet This!

Goals, Aspirations and Hubris

Over the last few years, I have prepared my annual "to do" list of goals and tactics. Being achievement oriented, I have found that stating my game plan helps me stick to getting it done.

Of course, one does need to be aware that publicly falling short can be painful... but nowhere near as painful as regret, or the haunting feeling when we know we let ourselves down.

Across the last four months, I realized the greatest benefit that I received from the last three years was athletic closure, rather than external "achievement" when I had a great race.

At the request of a friend, I went back into the archives and pulled up three pieces that I wrote early in my elite career (one, two, three). There are some common questions in those articles and somewhere in my decade of high level training I found the answers. More than just answers, what I really found was peace.

Athletics is externally unfair, due to the role of genetics, but internally fair, due to the relationship between performance and effort.

Athletic peace comes from knowing that you gave it your very best shot, rather than conquering others. I consider myself lucky to have had the opportunity to try, as well as, having the hidden skill set to excel. If you haven't read my story then article one (above) is a decent summary. I wasn't exactly awash with natural talent when I started...

So that is a rather long winded way to say that I don't have any athletic goals at present. I feel blessed to have been able to take myself far, far beyond what I ever dreamed possible. If you've been with me since the very early days then you might remember that I used to write poetry dreaming about sub-9 Ironman races!

Along my IronJourney, I learned a tremendous amount about what makes me tick. Even back in May 2001 (article three), I had a sense that the ultimate destination of training was to transcend training.

++

As I gain perspective, I find my plans shifting from "tactics to achieve goals" towards "strategies to maintain a fulfilling life". I still maintain my Personal Plan on a quarterly basis, but use the document to remind me to sustain good habits, rather than store a list to be ticked off.

So, to answer the comment about my goals (family, business, sport, etc...), if I had to put down a mission statement:

To maintain a fulfilling life until I die.

Now to do that, I need to apply several lessons that I have picked up along the way:

Family - We don't choose our family but we do choose our spouse. I put my wife first. Any person, or thing, that starts to cause friction in my marriage (even me) either changes, or is eliminated. I want to be there at my 50th wedding anniversary - that is a big goal of mine - because I know that if I act in such a way to get there... I will have lived a long life as a good man.

Business - I have a step-by-step strategic plan for Endurance Corner (more in the weeks to come). Distilling the desired outcome... to earn a fair return by helping people improve their lives through the lessons available from personal fitness.

How will I know I have achieved that goal? When my personal P&L is balanced, I have maintained my personal freedom and I sleep well at night. Right now, I am willing to exchange a fair amount of freedom to get my personal P&L back into balance!

Sport - At the top of any field, the requirements for (short term) achievement often run counter to maximizing (long-run) value. When I look around, I see that many of my pals are paying a pretty high price in their quest for athletic immortality. Knowing that I am often blind to my own patterns... the trials of miles could be adding up on me as well.

My mental well being has a strong correlation to my capacity to train (daily) and explore (weekly). The psychological benefits of fitness require a 600 hour per year commitment (YMMV). The extra ~900 hours, required to be my best (athletically), right now.. they don't add a whole lot to the quality of my life. You see, I answered my questions from 2001.

When I handed back my Private Equity partnership in 2000, I thought that I had answered many of the questions that we ask ourselves about status. I spent a decade working my butt off in finance, achieved more success than I thought possible and... nothing. I was the same guy sitting on a couch in the middle of a very nice townhouse.

Nearly a decade on from my decision to leave the structured corporate world, my core essence is similar but I'm not the same guy. Something about my athletic experience was different; a similar lesson had a different effect the second time; or the lesson lay in learning to cope with my limits, rather than transcending my successes.

Either way, I am more comfortable with myself and have a grasp at what's required to keep myself reasonably chipper:

  • Love Monsy.
  • Train daily.
  • Explore weekly.
  • Eat right.
  • Work on a project.

For the long term:

  • Spend less than I earn.
  • Learn new things.
  • Simplify schedule.
  • Preserve capital.
  • Tell the truth.

A good buddy pointed out that I am writing about being 40 a lot. He's right. Throughout my life, my 40th birthday was always a destination that I had in mind. I can easily remember my Dad's 40th.

There is an element of "what the heck now" some days. That's where those items above come in. I don't know what comes next, but I do know that I'll be happy today and (hopefully) stable tomorrow if I follow my own advice.

The transformative event in 2008, wasn't my birthday. My attitude adjustment came from seeing blood in my urine the night before Ironman Canada; realizing that I was going to die (eventually); and being OK with that.

While I shed a tear that night, I took comfort in knowing that I gave it my best shot.

Choose Wisely,

gordo

I set up a YouTube Channel -- I will be sharing blog-like thoughts weekly but don't want to shove it down your throat by embedding! This week I talk about technology impacting coaching/marketing.

Endurance Corner will be storing various clips relevant to our library as well. YouTube has a subscribe feature if you're interested.

Your feedback and comments over the last couple of months have been great, thanks for taking the time to write. In the migration across to the new site, we didn't quite get all the comments across. However, please keep them coming. I will continue to moderate comments and there will be a short delay between posting, and seeing your comment.

Turns out the blood was from a damaged urethra, rather than anything that would result in my imminent demise. With a bit of luck, I'll make it to my 50th with M.